My Top 10 Takeaways From Living With Monastics for Seven Days - You Must Know…

I went to Plum Village in the south of France with no expectations. I didn't even know what the place looked like. I knew I would enjoy learning, resting, connecting inwardly, meeting new people and, of course, eating really well. But I also wanted to deepen my understanding of Thich Nhat Hanh's teachings, the Mindfulness Trainings and Zen Buddhism, and to spend time living alongside the monastic community who continue to practise and share his teachings.

What I didn't expect was to do a lot of crying. To release deep-rooted pain that I didn't realise was still sitting beneath the surface. To chat to monks and nuns as though they were old friends. Or to find myself singing in front of 800 people on day seven.

I took so many amazing things away from my week at Plum Village, but there were a few lessons that really stayed with me. So here are my top 10 takeaways - things I want to share with my community, because perhaps one of them might resonate with you too.

1. Meditation Isn't Something You Can Be “Bad” At

I think so many people avoid meditation because they believe they “can't do it”. That their mind is too busy, they can't sit still, or they have too many thoughts. But perhaps that's the whole point.

Meditation isn't about having a perfectly empty mind. It's about becoming aware of what is already there. The thoughts, the mental chatter, the sensations in your body, the emotions, the discomfort, and the restlessness.

You don't have to change any of it, you simply notice. Not to allow the mind to take over the body.

And that, to me, is what makes meditation such an incredible resource. It's completely free, it's available to everyone, and you can practise it anywhere.

You don't need to be good at it. You just need to begin.

2. Why Are Humans Always in Such a Rush?

This was one of the things I became most aware of during my week at Plum Village.

Why was I eating so quickly? Why was I walking so quickly? Why was I brushing my teeth at such speed? Why was I talking this fast? Why was I driving as though I was late when I wasn't?

And then I started wondering whether this was just a me problem, or whether we've created a society where rushing has simply become normal. We're constantly trying to get somewhere else. The next meeting. The next email. The next achievement. The next part of our day.

But what are we actually rushing towards? Towards death. Perhaps slowing down isn't about having less to do. Perhaps it's about actually being present for the things we're already doing.

3. The World Keeps Moving When Your Phone Is Switched Off

I spent seven days without my phone, and, remarkably, the world kept turning.

My emails and messages were still there, my to-do list hadn't disappeared (unfortunately). My business didn't collapse, and nobody seemed to desperately need me. We live in a world where being constantly available has become almost expected. We're contactable at all hours, consuming information constantly and carrying our entire lives around in our pockets. But what happens when you put it down?

You create space, to think, to notice, and listen.

It reminded me that being unreachable for a while isn't irresponsible. Sometimes, it's necessary.

4. You Will Never Finish Your To-Do List

This one sounds obvious, but I don't think we actually live as though we believe it.

There will always be another email, a load of washing, more admin, another thing you could organise, improve, achieve or tick off. And if we're waiting until everything is finished before allowing ourselves to feel peaceful, happy or fulfilled, we'll be waiting forever.

Life is happening while the list is unfinished, and the destination to it ending is non-existent.

That doesn't mean we shouldn't be productive or responsible. It simply means we can't make our entire experience of happiness conditional on getting everything done first.

Perhaps we need to learn to find moments of joy and fulfilment in the middle of the unfinished life.

5. The Present Moment Is the Only Moment You Can Truly Experience

We spend so much of our lives living in the future. Planning ahead, worrying about it, anticipating and trying to control it. And of course, our choices today influence what might happen tomorrow. But the future isn't here yet. The only moment we can actually experience is this one.

This brought me back to the Buddhist concept of impermanence - the understanding that everything is constantly changing.

Our thoughts and feelings change. Our bodies and relationships change. Seasons change. Difficult moments pass, and beautiful moments pass too. Nothing stays exactly as it is.

And perhaps knowing that doesn't have to feel sad. Perhaps it makes the present moment even more precious. Because if everything is changing anyway, maybe we can stop trying so hard to hold onto it and simply be here for it while it's here.

6. Who Am I Without All My Roles?

I think this was one of the biggest reasons I needed to go away. I wanted to get to know myself again, without all the attachments, titles, expectations and roles that can so easily become wrapped around our identity. For seven days, I wasn't Nicole the yoga teacher, business owner or retreat leader. I wasn't someone's daughter, friend or sibling. I was simply Nicole, and that gave me space to ask myself some questions I don't always have the time or quiet to sit with. What do I actually want? What are my desires and aspirations? What genuinely excites me? What do I value? And ultimately, what is my purpose?

I certainly didn't come home with all the answers, but perhaps I didn't need to. Sometimes, creating enough silence simply allows you to hear yourself asking the questions again.

7. I Reclaimed My Relationship With Buddhism

I went to Plum Village wanting to deepen my understanding of Thich Nhat Hanh's teachings, the Mindfulness Trainings and Zen Buddhism, but experiencing those teachings within the community felt very different to simply reading about them. I was able to speak with monks and nuns as though they were old friends, observe how mindfulness was woven into ordinary moments, and experience the teachings through the way people lived and supported their community.

Something in me shifted. I felt like I was reclaiming my Buddhist faith in a way I haven't felt before.

For me, spirituality feels deeply connected to the earth, to nature, to interbeing with all living things, and to learning how to give back, support and love. It didn't feel like I was discovering something completely new, but rather reconnecting with a part of myself that had been quietly waiting for my attention.

8. How Much Do We Actually Need?

Living simply for a week inevitably made me question our relationship with consumption. How many clothes do we really need? How many pairs of shoes, jackets, books, pieces of furniture or things that we buy because we've convinced ourselves they will somehow make our lives better?

I'm certainly not suggesting we all need to give everything away and live like monks, but I do think it's worth becoming curious about why we constantly feel the need for more. We live in a world that is very good at convincing us that the next thing will make us happier, more successful, more comfortable or more complete.

But what happens when we stop adding and start appreciating? When we consume less and notice more? When we ask ourselves whether something genuinely adds value to our life before bringing more into it?

Maybe simple living isn't about having less for the sake of having less. Maybe it's about realising that enough is actually a lot.

9. You Cannot Control Everything, And That's Okay

I like to think I'm quite good at planning. Give me a calendar, a list and a plan and I'm happy. But life doesn't always follow our plans, does it?

Of course, we can influence our future through the choices we make today, but we cannot control it completely. And perhaps so much of our anxiety comes from trying to create certainty within a life that is inherently uncertain.

The present moment is where we actually have some agency. Not over everything that happens, but over how we choose to meet what is happening. Maybe peace isn't found in finally getting life under control. Maybe it's found in becoming more comfortable with the fact that we never will. Living each day as it comes.

10. What Is The Purpose Of All Of This?

After stripping everything back, this was perhaps the biggest question I came home with: what am I actually here for?

Not what do I want to achieve next? What do I want to build? What should I be doing? But what actually makes a life meaningful to me?

Perhaps purpose isn't something we suddenly discover at the end of a long journey. Perhaps it is something we create through the way we live each day - through connection, love, learning, contribution, presence and simply experiencing the world around us.

I don't think we need to have our entire lives figured out. And I don't think fulfilment is waiting somewhere in the future, once we've achieved enough, earned enough, bought enough or finished enough.

Life is happening now.